A Murder For Brother Hermitage

eBook Download

BOOK EXCERPT:

It's more medieval mystery for people who laugh. Number 1 best selling, prize winning Howard of Warwick is back with volume 12 of the Chronicles of Brother Hermitage; "this time it's historical." Norman England is still full of real people; the incompetent, the hopeless and the just plain useless. But what’s this? At the monastery of his friend Abbot Abbo, a young, naive and bookish monk is killed in chapter 1? Surely not? It can’t be. The death of this particular monk sets off a chain of events that’s tangled to say the least. The news must be taken to Derby, home of Wat, erstwhile weaver of pornographic tapestry and Cwen, fierce and independent weaver in her own right. Then the death must be investigated, of course it must, and the guilty held to account. But the guilty seem to be queuing up in this case, and show not the least sign of shame, let alone guilt. In fact, they’re quite proud of what they've done. Brother Hermitage, the King’s Investigator, made a lot of enemies over the last 11 books. It was bound to go horribly wrong sooner or later. "Horrible" and "wrong" crop up quite often where Brother Hermitage is concerned. But, you need to read the book if you want to make any sense of all this; even then, there are no guarantees. Some people have said "hilarious", some have said "very, very funny," others have said "stupid" (the good and bad kind). Nearly 100,000 people have succumbed to the nonsense that is Howard of Warwick. 1,000 reviews, Amazon number 1s, 5* littering the floor of the scriptorium? There must be something in it. (May require prior reading of course HW101: medieval detection, the Hermitage years)

Product Details :

Genre : Fiction
Author : Howard of Warwick
Publisher : The Funny Book Company
Release : 2018-09-24
File : 257 Pages
ISBN-13 : 9781999895969


Brother Hermitage S Christmas Gift

eBook Download

BOOK EXCERPT:

In a modest little tale for the season, Brother Hermitage heads for London. William Duke of Normandy is to be crowned King of England on Christmas day 1066 and he expects presents. For reasons beyond reason, the monastery of De'Ath's Dingle is invited to the ceremony and the only ones who can be let out on their own are Brother Hermitage and Wat the Weaver. But it will be a rush to get there. With only 7 days to travel over 100 miles, the pair must cross a frozen and largely lawless country if they are to make it to Westminster alive. And then there's the problem of Wat's attitude towards gifts in principle. He doesn't mind a reasonable exchange but simply giving sounds like a very poor deal. Perhaps the days of the journey will give Brother Hermitage the opportunity to breathe the spirit of the season into his weaving friend. Or perhaps not. Recent reviews for Howard of Warwick continue a theme: 5* "Very funny" 5* "Another demented tale" 5* "Briiiiiliant as always."

Product Details :

Genre : Fiction
Author : Howard of Warwick
Publisher : The Funny Book Company
Release : 2017-11-30
File : 120 Pages
ISBN-13 : 9781999895907


A Murder Of Convenience

eBook Download

BOOK EXCERPT:

Medieval Crime Comedy continues unabated as Howard of Warwick refuses to be abated. From the Best-Selling author of this very peculiar genre comes yet more medieval murder with the usual dash of nonsense. This time, there’s murder in the air; and in the bushes, the castles, the highways and byways. And Brother Hermitage is caught in the middle of the lot; as usual. Even though he’s expecting a murder to be dropped in his lap at any moment, the arrival of this one and the manner of its delivery take him completely by surprise. As the tale unravels, a simple murder and an investigation to discover the culprit would be a bit of a relief. But the Normans seem to be at the bottom of this and their intentions are wholly dishonourable. When the church puts its nose in the mix, Wat the Weaver concludes that they are completely out of their depth. But there is a victim, or there might be, and action must be taken. A journey to Nottingham reunites them with some old friends, well, friends-ish, but they seem as confused as everyone else. At least Cwen finds an ally, which gives Wat plenty to worry about. When the weaver gets drunk and comes up with the most ridiculous suggestion for a murder investigation that any of them have ever heard, it’s clear that things have gone downhill very quickly. With very important people showing a great interest in this business, Hermitage has to be very careful with his, “aha”; if he can even come up with one that makes sense. Who did whatever it is that might have been done? Will everyone live happily ever after? Were they living happily to begin with? Read A Murder of Convenience and there’s a small chance you might find out. And then there’s the crime of Mrs Grod’s cooking. Reviews for previous volumes: 5* Brilliant tale of mayhem and murder 5* Genius, funny, endearing and a proper page turner 5* Howard of Warwick never fails to deliver a good laugh

Product Details :

Genre : Fiction
Author : Howard of Warwick
Publisher : The Funny Book Company
Release : 2021-06-24
File : 247 Pages
ISBN-13 : 9781913383183


Murder Midst Merriment

eBook Download

BOOK EXCERPT:

Amazon top 20 best seller, Howard of Warwick delivers a Medieval Crime Comedy for our times. Of course, if anyone is unable to keep up with the times, it’s going to be Brother Hermitage. Now nominated for the CWA 2024 Historical Dagger award. Influencers, the nature of truth, state propaganda? And all nearly 1,000 years ago. Some things never change. When conflicting versions of the Norman Conquest are offered to the people of Derby, Brother Hermitage is in the audience to hear both sides. But, if Brother Hermitage is in the audience, someone is at serious risk of ending up less alive than they used to be. As Wat and Cwen the weavers point out, Brother Hermitage, the King’s Investigator of murder, after all, was standing right there when the deed was done. How can he not know who did it? Well, he will simply have to investigate as he always does, and the facts will be revealed. Unfortunately, everyone seems to have their own version of the facts and they can’t all be right. When even the liars are lying about their lies, and the people who know the truth don’t know that they know it, things are bound to be confusing. But someone has been shot. With a bow and arrow, a rare item in Anglo-Saxon Derby. Someone must have seen something. And in this case, everyone is talking. They just aren’t saying anything reliable. Never fear. Brother Hermitage will knock this investigation on the head. Unless someone knocks him on the head first, of course. Non mitterent nuncio, as Hermitage might say. Don’t shoot the messenger. Oh, too late. The 29th Chronicle of Brother Hermitage carries the familiar warning; if you like your historical mysteries serious and sombre, look away now. 5* Hilarious medieval murder 5* Another hysterical masterpiece 5* Good humour and funny, clever characters

Product Details :

Genre : Fiction
Author : Howard of Warwick
Publisher : The Funny Book Company
Release : 2023-07-24
File : 234 Pages
ISBN-13 : 9781913383541


Murder Can Be Murder

eBook Download

BOOK EXCERPT:

It's only murder, why is it so difficult? When Brother Hermitage is approached on the streets of Derby, he knows that it is going to be bad news. As King William's duly appointed investigator, everything is bad news. But young Fridolf, an apprentice goldsmith from London has the most bizarre request concerning a murder that Hermitage has ever heard. Still, at least he has the opportunity to make things very clear and put the young man straight before sending him on his way. Until Wat and Cwen explain that Hermitage hasn't made anything clear at all and that if calamity is to be avoided, some action is needed. Luckily, for a weaver's workshop, Wat's home has a surfeit of investigators and so a despatch to London will not be a problem. And a trip to London, just to make sure everything is all right, will be a positive pleasure. Until those despatched get themselves in trouble, of course. Most unreasonably of all, those wretched Normans have decided that the old Saxon punishment for murder, a hefty fine, is no longer sufficient. They have something much more permanent in mind. Containing many facts, including the Saxon defeat of the Norman army in 1066, and a real-life sheriff of London, Murder Can Be Murder goes where other medieval mysteries wouldn’t bother. Howard of Warwick, now a UK top 20 Amazon best-seller, brings more real life to the medieval murder mystery. Along with real confusion, greed and all-around incompetence. Previous chronicles, of which there are many, have been commented upon. 5* Fantastic series 5* Hilarious 5* You know you’re in for a good giggle 1* Reads like an episode of Blackadder

Product Details :

Genre : Fiction
Author : Howard of Warwick
Publisher : The Funny Book Company
Release : 2023-03-24
File : 258 Pages
ISBN-13 : 9781913383534


No Murder Here

eBook Download

BOOK EXCERPT:

5* Absolutely brilliant, as always. 5* So well written, so entertaining and amusing. 5* A great read from start to finish There is no murder here. And even if there was, under no circumstances is Brother Hermitage, King William’s investigator, to be allowed anywhere near it. This is a very sensitive matter for the Duke of Normandy, now King of England, and he wants it dealt with properly. He doesn’t want a band of Saxon idiots trampling all over the place, offending everyone. But, in a far-off outpost of the duchy, an ancient ritual has been enacted, which immediately went horribly wrong. Someone must be sent to find out what happened and who is behind it. Negotiating the way through scheming and feuding locals will demand sensitivity. Untangling superstition from fact will require careful analysis. Appreciating custom and practice will need a sympathetic ear. And you’ll need to speak the right language, obviously. So, this is really not a job for Brother Hermitage. It’s probably even more inappropriate for the weavers, Wat and Cwen - the woman who stares at people and the man who made those disgusting pictures. Keep them away. However, the more explicit the instruction, the greater the chance of mistake… In any case, there is no murder here. Oh, really?

Product Details :

Genre : Fiction
Author : Howard of Warwick
Publisher : The Funny Book Company
Release : 2024-02-29
File : 278 Pages
ISBN-13 : 9781913383626


Murder Most Murderous

eBook Download

BOOK EXCERPT:

From Best-Selling Howard of Warwick stumbles yet more medieval mystery that doesn't know when to stop. Warning: If you like your medieval detectives sombre and serious, this is not the place for you. It is Murder Most Murderous. “Aha” on page 1? This can’t be right. When Brother Hermitage starts the latest investigation by working out who did it, you know that things are bound to be going wrong by page 2; nothing in Hermitage’s life is that easy. And surely, William the Conqueror hasn’t dragged Hermitage, Wat the Weaver and Cwen across the country just to idle away the passing moments? There’s a dead Norman noble to be considered, and quickly because William hasn’t got all day. But what Hugues d’Auffay, owner of the body in question, was up to is a mystery in its own right. His father behaved strangely enough; he fought in the battle near Hastings, conquered the country and then went home again. Why would any self-respecting Norman conqueror do that? Hugues himself had plans but no one is talking. Perhaps the servants can be persuaded to spill the turnips? But they’ve got their own world to organise; entirely to their advantage, and so will need some persuasion. The Saxon servants are keeping a dark secret in a locked trunk, one that the Normans are very keen to get their hands on. Is there a bargain to be made? Is the curse on the d’Auffay family to be believed? Can Brother Hermitage really use questionable methods to get information? And why do people keep dying? All of life is here: tapestries that dare not show their faces; a curse from an old wise-ish woman; a physick who is surprised at the number of dead bodies one investigation can produce. Read the 23rd Chronicle of Brother Hermitage and you’ll wonder why the King’s Investigator still hasn’t got the hang of it. Chronicle No. 22 garnered comment aplenty: 5* Outright Laughter 5* Laughed till my sides ached. (The Funny Book Company cannot accept responsibility for injured sides.) 5* If you're into history, crime thrillers or humour this is the series for you. 5* What fun.

Product Details :

Genre : Fiction
Author : Howard of Warwick
Publisher : The Funny Book Company
Release : 2021-11-24
File : 257 Pages
ISBN-13 : 9781913383220


A Murder For Mistress Cwen

eBook Download

BOOK EXCERPT:

For a medieval monk who hates investigating anything, Brother Hermitage seems to do it quite a lot. As he stumbles into his 10th full length tale, signs of improvement remain stubbornly invisible. When Stigand of Arundel arrives in Derby with a commission from King William to buy some very expensive hawks, Wat, Weaver of adult tapestry sees an opportunity for profit. Brother Hermitage sees only trouble. We then discover that Cwen, fine young tapestrier with a good eye for colour, nimble fingers and a frightening temper, also has some very peculiar relatives. So peculiar that they warrant investigation in their own right. Once more there is murder and of course there are Normans and Vikings and Saxons. If any of them actually has a clue what's going on they're not saying anything. In his previous debacles Brother Hermitage relied on Wat and Cwen for guidance, support and frequent reminders to use some common sense. This time they’re all up to their eyes in it but surely things can’t go any worse? Medieval Crime Comedy is not going away and Howard of Warwick doesn’t know any better… 5* “Hilarious” 5* “Laugh out loud funny” 5* “Great fun”

Product Details :

Genre : Fiction
Author : Howard of Warwick
Publisher : The Funny Book Company
Release : 2017-10-24
File : 224 Pages
ISBN-13 : 9781913383343


Not Another Murder

eBook Download

BOOK EXCERPT:

Not Another Murder. A question? A statement? Or the despairing sigh of a monk convinced that Death's scythe must have caught in his habit? Escape from Gernesey and a return to Derby is on everyone's mind, but events have spotted Brother Hermitage, and they're up to their usual tricks. This time, they've put him in a priory. What could be better? And what could possibly go wrong? The cloistered life has called him back and so all will be well. There will be no murder here, even though he's the King's Investigator. No one will die, ignoring the deaths that seem to follow him around. And anyway, this is only temporary. There won't be time for anything untoward to happen. Brother Hermitage hasn't been reading his own chronicles, has he? While Wat and Cwen try to make the best of things and work out who to bribe to get out of this place, Hermitage doesn't even make it through the first night before the body turns up. How it was done is a complete mystery, never mind why. And there is certainly something odd about this priory and its monks, who don't seem at all concerned that one of them is now dead. But a route off the island quickly opens up before them, and so there might not be time to solve some murder. With any luck, they'll be miles away before long. All they need is some money; considerably more money than they currently have. That priory seemed to have a lot of treasure... Embark on Chronicle number thirty-two, and your mind will be filled with wonder. (Wondering why, mainly.)

Product Details :

Genre : Fiction
Author : Howard of Warwick
Publisher : The Funny Book Company
Release : 2024-06-24
File : 243 Pages
ISBN-13 : 9781913383640


Hermitage Wat And Some Druids

eBook Download

BOOK EXCERPT:

Brother Hermitage is at it again - this time with druids. Is it a murder mystery? Is it a thriller? Is it just something gone horribly wrong? When his nemesis, the Norman conqueror Le Pedvin orders him to Wales, Brother Hermitage knows it is going to go wrong. He's had a prophecy it's going to go wrong. And from his first steps on the road it strides firmly in that direction. Brother Hermitage, Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry and Cwen, weaver in her own right and the fiercest of the lot, are commanded to find one dead Norman in the whole of Wales - as usual under pain of death. Add to that some treasure and a druid curse or two, and we have the recipe for a laugh out loud historical tale like no other. (Apart from the other Chronicles of Brother Hermitage) It's all complicated enough, but when what seems like the whole of the country wants to join in, things get very messy. And then there are the druids, and stone circles, and sacrifices.... "he who has laughter on his side has no need of proof" Theodore Adorno

Product Details :

Genre : Fiction
Author : Howard of Warwick
Publisher : The Funny Book Company
Release : 2015-12-20
File : 281 Pages
ISBN-13 : 9780992939373