I told my mom I couldn't reach the high notes in my choir class... She said I should get a ladder! Every time we go to the ocean, my mom tells me to say hello... the ocean just waves back! If you love arguing about why it’s important to wear a coat when it’s 12 degrees outside... you should be a mom! There’s a legend that if you go take a shower and scream “MOM!” three times... a nice lady appears with the towel you forgot! The next time your young comedian is looking to serve up priceless entertainment, share Best. Mom Jokes. Ever.! Get ready for eyerolls, head shakes, and "aha" moments as you navigate through these mom jokes that make little truths so funny. If you think you’ve heard every mom joke in the book, think again. Best. Mom Jokes. Ever. is sure to have you throwing up your hands and declaring, “Because I said so!”

Successful editor, comedy writer and author Judy Brown (Joke Soup and Joke Stew), has brought together some of the best one liners about parenthood in thie new book Mom: This Jokes For You. The jokes are written by some of the top comedians of our time, including Rodney Dangerfield, Joan Rivers, George Carlin, Jerry Seinfeld and more. Featuring chapters such as "They Call It Labor For A Reason", this colorful gift/humor books include all the traditional favorite one-liners about pregnancy, new parents, the teenage years and more.

The 35th annual edition of Uncle John’s compendium features entertaining, informative, and amusing real-life stories from around the world. This 35th anniversary edition of Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader is bursting with everything you could possibly want to read in the throne room, including short articles for a quick trip and lengthier page-turners for an extended visit. Uncle John and his team at the Bathroom Readers’ Institute have once again gathered the most entertaining and amusing stories from the realms of pop culture, history, science, and sports (not to mention accounts of even more dumb crooks!) for your reading pleasure. In addition, there are plenty of laugh-out-loud lists, amusing quotes, and odd factoids that will delight the most ardent of trivia fans.

The authors of Okay, Boomer deliver much-needed one-liners, puns, lists, and real-life tweets to lighten the load—and life—of moms everywhere. Moms need their laughs just as much as anyone, especially when they have to relieve the stress of cranky kids, oblivious spouses, and the challenges of balancing work and family while keeping it all together—at least on the surface! Mom Jokes is a collection of more than 300 snarky, sassy, and witty jokes for moms, such as . . . Every Mother’s Day my children make me breakfast in bed. Good thing I taught them how to make bottomless mimosas. What’s the difference between me when I’m nine months pregnant and a supermodel? Nothing, because my husband values his life. The good thing about going back to work after having kids is that you have your mom boss voice perfected. I thought my seven-year-old was mature enough to feed our goldfish—and he is—he just isn’t mature enough to know they don’t eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. From family life and the daily grind to food and entertainment, this collection of jokes nails the ups and downs of motherhood, giving moms light-hearted moments to get through the heavy lifting.

We all know that moms need (and deserve) a break, so we’ve made it easy. Now, moms everywhere can grab their favorite beverage and laugh out loud while completing these word search puzzles. Trust us, this isn’t your grandma’s word search. Every mom who needs a break (aka, every mom) can kick back and relax with this word search book. Each spread features the very real and real hilarious jokes Scary Mommy is known for, along with a word search based on relatable themes such as work-life balance, morning mayhem, and the struggle to make space for self-care. For new and veteran moms alike, Scary Mommy Word Search will give you just what you need: the ability to look preoccupied so no one bothers you.

Discover hundreds of jokes for every occasion! Why was the limbo dancer shocked when his wallet was stolen right out of his back pocket? Because he didn't think anyone could stoop so low. The ultimate collection of the world’s greatest funnies, The Best Joke Book (Period) keeps you laughing for hours on end. Inside, you'll find hundreds of jokes that are guaranteed to stir up a room full of smiles, including knock-knocks, witty puns, and one-liners. Complete with hilarious quotes from celebrities like Jon Stewart, Lewis Black, and Jerry Seinfeld, everyone will revel in each gut-busting moment. So whether you’re looking to add a few jokes to your repertoire, impress your buds, or improve your banter, this sidesplitting book arms you with the perfect joke for any occasion!

A fantasy about the nearest future with deep thoughts on life. Meet Nick, an expat translator who hears about a new hotel opening in the city. Hotel The World opens its doors for everyone presenting a new reality of traveling. Discover its secrets together with Nick and his friends.

Bitter/Sweet: Surviving the Struggle Within describes my efforts to face the fears and pain of love and self-love, sickness and health, death and spirituality, and forgiveness. It also expresses my hope to find the answers to life’s questions. First I had to acknowledge self, because without self-acknowledgement, every obstacle will magnify. In understanding what makes me tick and how my past could hold me back, I learned to love myself, which allowed me to find true love. Bitter poisons that once flowed through my veins, are now replaced with the sweet taste of honey. My agonies, frustrations, and pain took me on one excursion after another. The only true journey toward growth and fulfillment is tunneling through the many avenues of self. I had to go within before I could move forward. I had to master this expedition. No matter what I seek, everything I need is already inside me. Am I important enough to myself to go within and search for what I want and need? It is what I choose to accept about my life that will make it “Bitter” or “Sweet.” And I realize that I am not alone. Everyone experiences pain and discord. I hope my words reach others so they too can rejoice. I have learned to celebrate the child within to overcome past hurts and all the old “Bitter/Sweet” experiences. This chronicles where I have been, where I am today, and what I have accomplished.

This book should be on every writer, would-be-writer, or reader's bookshelf. Unlike the hundreds of how-to books, Mr. Charlton leads us down a winding path to becoming a writer. Irreverent at times and solemn at others, he lays out his pratfalls of growing up but never mocks. His explanations are clear and concise. His short stories entertain but are there to draw from. This unique meandering through a writer's mind answers one of the essential questions writers answer in interviews: "How do you come up with _______?"Charlton introduces us to his formative people, explaining how he drew from each person to produce specific characters or circumstances. Consider this a cipher or companion handbook to his books. In his lectures on writing, Mr. Charlton explains writing dense or contextually rich novels that are not drudgery to read. In his mysteries, he drops clues like a flirtatious southern lady would drop her handkerchief. Even the most innocent offhanded reference should never be a throwaway line. Throwaway lines are indirectly filler or fluff. In this day of expensive printing, word count should be the last bloviated fixture in a novel. Learning to write concisely should be the goal of every writer. Charlton discusses writing to the changing word counts in journalism, or even to an exact word count for a contest. His writing exercises are merely for self-examination. He uses his family as a collection of tools and information about the varieties of family undercurrents. Ozzie and Harriet were good for thirty minutes each week in the fifties but became tediously plebian for a novel-especially in a mystery or thriller. Better to substitute Ozzy Osbourne for the paternal role. Once he shows his youth lessons, Mr. Charlton interjects some of his favorite short stories. These are the stories he uses as lessons, building characters real enough for them to snatch the storytelling from the writer and reveal the story, which is only theirs to tell. Characters, storytelling, novels, or movies will never be the same again. As Charlton loves to point out-not all mysteries are murders, and not all murders are mysteries.

Discover the transformative journey of healing and hope in Gold Scars. When faced with profound loss and trauma, it often feels like there's nowhere to turn, and the words of well-meaning loved ones too often fall short. But is there a way to mend the shattered pieces of one's life and uncover the beauty within their scars? Join grief specialist Sylvia Clements Myers as she offers guidance through the seven pivotal areas of life where one may feel shattered. Drawing inspiration from the art of Kintsugi, she reveals how people can heal and grow stronger by filling their wounds with gold. With courage, acceptance, and a touch of humor, you'll learn to embrace your scars and reclaim joy, health, hope, and experience God’s holiness.